Sunday, July 29, 2007

No Limits

I had a wonderful hypnosis session with Carmen Friday afternoon. It had been a while since we had talked due to vacations, moving, family visits, etc. Prior to all this I had her do a custom hypnosis CD for me which served as a wonderful booster in the interim. The CD session reaffirmed my ever growing feminine identity. I truly am Stephanie, and she will not be denied.

While not going into all the details of our session, I do want to share I discussed with Carmen my desire to find a girlfriend that truly appreciates me as a woman. Part of the conversation prior to our session involved me talking about playing the dating game. In that game, I felt pigeonholed into playing the role of the man... i.e. find the girl, go out, get married, get a house, have three kids, etc. Carmen said, "But that's not who you are." I had been approaching the dating game as if I were a man looking for a woman, but I really am a woman looking for a woman. Once again I had let society dictate the rules.

In my hypnosis sessions with Carmen, many of my revelations and insights don't come immediately. This time though, one phrase stood out. One of the final thoughts she gave me was "no obstacles." I knew I had heard something similar in Star Trek. I found it in Gene Roddenberry's closing comments on the original pilot called "The Cage." Roddenberry is talking the potential of mankind. He then steps in the transporter chamber and says, "For us... no limits" before beaming off.

I initially wrote Carmen back seeing it as a challenge to not be satisfied with your current state of affairs. The more I think about it though, it goes far beyond that. I have to stop creating obstacles to my happiness. There are enough legitimate problems in this world without creating more of them. Even with those, there will always be a solution. My happiness and fulfillment is simply too important to let society's rules get in the way. They don't work for everyone particularly when it comes to falling in love. The gay community has known this for a long time that it's the person and not the packaging that you fall in love with. So when I hear the phrase "No Limits," that is one area of my life where I must truly live it. Carmen has said there is someone out there for me, and I have so much to offer. In a sense, I am cheating two people... myself and my future partner. That's why I have my bridal picture above. A girl has to plan ahead, ya know! ;)

I will leave you with a picture of Carmen because I think she is a beautiful person inside and out. Yes, I am one of her hypnosis clients, but we are also friends. I would encourage anyone seeking to learn more about their feminine side to drop her a line. She has challenged me with a mission of sorts to find that special someone. Yes, there will be hurt, but there will be also be tremendous joy and fulfillment that cannot be found any other way. Another reason she is a friend is she knows how to bring out the best in me. I can only hope I do the same for her from time to time.

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